Now, Where Has All That Time Gone?
A nurse once revealed peoples greatest regrets on their death beds and guess what topped the list. “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.’
Isn’t it funny how when we wake up each and every morning, we feel we have endless amounts of hours to plan but then the days just fly by and you look back and wonder, ‘Now, where has all that time gone?’ ‘What have I done with it?’ ‘I had scribbled a To Do List, a Bucket List and a New Years Resolution List.. Let’s see… How many items can give me that feeling of fulfillment as I cross them off? Not once but ten times, it just feels better that way right? The past year? The past three years? I might as well look into the past six years!
Logic: Increase time frame, better results. Right? Wrong! You read through it and re-read through it in a little disbelief.. Why? Because not much of it has been ticked off, I mean let’s be honest here… I’ll be lucky to find something I could semi tick off. You know, when we do the whole feel good denial stuff? I didn’t exactly do it but kind of did it so let’s just cross it off to feel better!! Yes, you have been too busy! Too busy with life’s daily responsibilities, obligations, activities, work, kids, family, friends, and colleagues. In short: the social order of life.
I remember that moment of awe just a few years ago (I should have taken a selfie of my facial expression – sooo not me but just saying). I was back in Belgium where I grew up. Stepping into my flowery pink bedroom brought back all my warm childhood memories. Then I saw my sacred keepsake box. It was where I stored all my special mementos – cards, diaries, gifts, shorts I used to fit into at 16 with friend’s signatures scribbled all over, old yearbooks with personal messages and many, many more. I began to get lost in my box of memories. A little like Inside Out’s ball of memories (for those that love watching animated cartoons and getting in touch with their childish selves).
Suddenly, I came across my 2005 Bucket List which read a little like this:
- See the Aurora Borealis
- Three months backpacking in South America
- Be a Doctor
- Learn Salsa
- Lose Weight and Exercise
- Volunteer/Community Service
Moment of DISBELIEF… Refer back to my present 2015 new list… TEN years later and I have accomplished two and a half of these; I lost weight by following a healthy lifestyle, started salsa (but never fully committed because I don’t have time), started volunteering (but never fully committed because I don’t have time), started painting (but never fully committed because I don’t have time) and didn’t become a Doctor due to unexpected turns in my life (but at least now I am on the journey of helping others in a different way). Do those add up to two and a half ticks? An epiphany moment that was most significant in my memory felt experience is my 2005 list still reads the same 10 years down the line? ‘The heart wants what it wants.’ Deep down your gut always knows what it desires and what you are passionate about…
So, where has all that time gone??